European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby
English will be the official language of the European Union rather
than German, which was the other possibility.
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- As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that
English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted
a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
- In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this
will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
- The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear
up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
- There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when
the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words
like fotograf 20% shorter.
- In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted
to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
- Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters
which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling .
- Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the
languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
- By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing
"th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
- During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords
kontaining "ou"and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
- Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
- Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey
vunted in ze forst plas.
If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.... 
